Here are a few words to consider during your chugging experiences.

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Its time again for Turkey Bowl See Earlier post http://belly.net/?p=213

Check out the website here –> http://www/turkeybowl.tv

Get Your Balls Ready for Turkey Bowl 10!

Gotta love these strange beer Pics!

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Ok, here are a few more examples of people who have not consumed in moderation and have would up in, shall we say, precarious positions?  The next time you ride out last call or kill that floating keg just remember, this could be you.  And you can be sure that Belly has no mercy for you.  If you wind up being the brunt of these types of entertaining images, you can bet your pretty drunken face will be plastered all over my blog.  Get you a cold beer and make sure you don’t pass out in the living room!  -Belly

I think he cracked a smile!

What a balancing act!

The awards keep pouring in!

Is that some type of male bonding?

Asleep on the job?

That’s a wrap amigo!

Such comfortable sleeping arrangments.

Yellow and blue make green!
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You may want to clean yourself up.

I think we all have been here.

Dead Drunk!

Tired of getting walked on?

That’s cruise ship talent!

Max Factor would be proud!

Due to the rise of modern technology, I have been yearning to expand my technical chugging abilities.  In the early days of industrial science, I would only perform analog chugs, which were the mainstream beer consumption techniques of that era.  I soon became bored and needed more than a static beer getting warm in a stale mug.

Welcome to Chug 2.0., a modernized method of mass consumption which encompasses the modern tools and devices which we all find useful.  Today, we enjoy hi-tech chugging mechanisms which not only improve mass consumption standards, they also increase the overall amount of beer consumed.  And recently, with the arrival of ”social chugging”, I have begun to appreciate the cutting-edge digital chugging experience.  With this refreshing overhaul of my antiquated drinking skills, I sense my prevailing chugging behaviours are modernized, and I push forward into this millenia leading the way toward full digital chugging!   Get yourself a techno brew and tweet me later.  -Belly

One question I have always asked myself during my beer chugging episodes is, how much beer is too much??  Is that even POSSIBLE??   Maybe, but for some of the wimps you are about to see, it was a reality.  Remember to chug in moderation, which in itself is an oxymoron.  Be careful with mass consumption or you could be exploited here next! Get you a cold one!   –Belly

Maybe He was thirsty and couldn’t make it home?

This guy knew he would have to “GO’ Eventually!

At least she didn’t make a mess!

What a lightweight!

He just pulled over to sleep it off.

Lush Alert!!

Did Pretty Boy have too many wine coolers??

I LOVE what you have done with the interior!

He needs to get out more!

Is that what you call shitty ass drunk?

Don’t wake him!  He is sleeping so peacefully!

“This is surprisingly comfortable.”

Almost made it.

Your guess is as good as mine!

When I was a kid, things were different.  A kid could get away with getting some beer.  Parents were more trusting, or just didn’t care.  All my friends would say, “Man, your parents are COOL!”  With my older brothers and sisters, I always was around beer and people drinking beer.  I firmly believe that’s one of the reasons I have acquired such mad chugging skillz.  I vaguely remember that my dad would sneak some Gennessee cream ale into my bottle, I remember my first buzz!  I took that Big Wheel for quite a spin that day.  When I was a little older, I actually got a Big Boy cup.  It looked a lot like a mug.

I chugged my first beer at 14 months old.  I remember it like it was 40 years ago.  An ice cold Bud in the bottle!   Then, when I was about 3 1/2, I got the Mattel Beer Bong, that’s one toy that was way ahead of it’s time.  It was those early years where I refined my craft.  By the age of five, I could out-chug my Dad, and from then on, the accolades just kept pouring in.  I remained focused throughout my youth, and became a contender in the youth chugging movement of the 1980’s.     I didn’t break any records, but It propelled me into a lifelong journey that covered all aspects of chugging beer.  I do not condone underage chugging, but since I began my chugging career as an infant, I reap the rewards of extended experience, and now reign superior as the Chug Master!  And for that, I am eternally grateful!

Get Yourself a Cold Beer Baby!!

-Belly

Imagine 7:00 am on a cold Thanksgiving Day morning at a secluded location in Central Florida. A group of strangely costumed and oddly motivated men begin to arrive. This isn’t just another flag football game. This is a unique fraternity of friends risking divorce in a desperate competition vying for the ultimate and most coveted award, the Mr. Turkey Bowl Trophy.

This male-bonding debauchery began nearly a decade ago, brought from Chicago by the founders, The Ehrhards. The group is divided into two teams, equally matched by size and speed. A bar graces the sidelines with plenty of cold beer for everyone. The amount of beer consumed is tallied by the beertenders and a “touchdown” is awarded for the team which consumes the most beer. This always puts my team a score ahead before kickoff. The most outrageous and often racy costumes are always a hoot. The idea is to be creative, acting your part, and stay in character during the game. Some of the costumes over the years included “The Chess Coach”, who would scream”CHECKMATE!” as he took you down, The Guzzling Grandma, beer swilling champion from 1946, and the latest trio from the Blue Man Group.

In recent years, a Monday Night Mixer was added to help the teammates get acquainted. This results in a party which the rookies are introduced and hazed into this elite club. I dare say these techniques are out of control and equally as ruthless. But I have said too much. Moving on to Turkey Bowl 10 in 2009, “A Decade of Decadence” what this football folly has in store is yet to be seen. Look for a website which will include every detail of past and future events, and some pretty damn funny video too. Later this year, www.turkeybowl.tv

Thats all for now, Get yourself a cold beer and get back to the huddle!

Belly

Its that time again! When we all put our disguises on and get away with acting like an idiot! There is something about Halloween that brings out the inhibitions of people. Once someone is behind a mask and they think they are anonymous (even though we know who they are), they seem to act loosely. It’s always a good night for the single person. Meet someone who looks good in their costume. Dance crazily (Like the Angel & Devil dryhumping on the dance floor), then continue the night of unbridled debauchery in a hayloft at the Tucker Farm out yonder. Did you bring the black and orange balloons??

But don’t forget to add the beer! There are Oktoberfests, pumpkin beers, and kegs shaped like pumpkins. Don’t chug too many though or you may look like Pukey the Jerk-O-Lantern. Make sure you drink just enough beer, so if those masks come off during (whatever) you won’t run screaming out the barn door! If you do, don’t forget the Jack-O-Cooler filled with Pumpkin Ale!

BOO! Getcha a cold Beer!

Belly

I was driving thru Pine Hills yesterday, which is an area of town riddled with crime and homelessness.  I saw something that made me appreciate what I have.  Besides cold beer I mean.  This poor bum was rolled up like a twinkie in a matress cushion. 

I have a bed.  I have a roof.  Those are two essential things which are important to me.  A lot of people who do not have those two things still have beer.  While I understand the need and want for beer, even I know that lifes necessities must come first.  Beer can come second.

Ghetto Sponge Bob made me realize that there are some things more important than beer.  a bed and a roof.  Thats It.  Now I know I have my priorities straight!!

Getch ya a cold beer & hurry yass’ up!!

Belly